It’s a New Day!

I stopped counting how many times I’ve apologized for not writing more often, or for how often I have messed up. How many times have I written, “I am recommitting myself”? I’ve lost count. This past month has been a real struggle and I could have easily just thrown in the towel and said, it’s too hard. I thought about it more than once trust me. But I want better for myself. I want better for my brother Jason. I know that God wants better for both of us.
I was listening to music today on my morning walk (I even stopped doing that for the past month) and I paid particular attention to one of my favourite songs by David Crowder, How He Loves. There is one line in particular that stood out to me “I don’t have time to maintain these regrets” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TCunuL58odQ
That is what I have been doing this past month is throwing myself a wee pity party. I stopped writing, not only because of laziness, but because I didn’t want everyone to know how poorly I was doing. I’ve been fretting over not reaching my goal.
You might have noticed that we have past the 6 month mark that we set our original goal towards, 60 lbs in 6 months. Call it stress, laziness, overworked, uninterested, whatever, but this month has been the toughest yet, not because of bad habits (although they returned like a tsunami) but because of a lack of motivation. As Jason and I both reluctantly weighed in this week I was struck with something. We haven’t been competing for a while, but just going through the motions. I suggested that we start competing again, that maybe that competitive spirit will invigorate us to really step up and do better. So I lost the weigh in and we went to a movie. (Yeah, Thor 2!) But we both put a new goal to reach. Jason wanted to be at 50 lbs down by New Years Eve, me 40 lbs. If I don’t reach my goal then I will wash, wax, vacuum, completely clean from top to bottom, Jason’s 15 passenger car. If Jason doesn’t reach his goal, he will go to the Polar Bear Swim with me on January 1st. I think that sounds pretty good.
These new goals reflect our past attempts and when we were on track and doing well. These goals should be attainable if we stick to it.
So we say goodbye to the 6 month mark and hello to the new 6 week mark. Maybe setting smaller goals more frequently will work out better. But the good news is that w are both still down substantially from when we started this journey in the first place, and we have tools now that we didn’t have before that will help us maintain weight instead of gaining. We just need to be perseverant and strong.
One more song to leave you with that struck me today, it is by the band Rend Collective and the song is called Alabaster. The reason it struck me today in particular is that I have again been relying on my own strength, my own pride, to try to become a better man. I should know by now that I can do nothing without the grace of God and I need to fall at His feet often to praise Him and thank Him.

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