Woohoooo!

Thursday was weigh in day. As my good buddy just mentioned, I was down 5 lbs. That’s my biggest loss since the first week. I think it came at a pretty important time too. I have been a little stressed at the slow progress. It did make me think though of my wheat addiction and its connection with weight loss.
Let me take you on a mental (and spiritual) journey of insight;
I’ve mentioned before and will likely mention many more times that I love bread. It really is only bread, not wheat in many of its other forms. I love a good loaf of warm homemade bread and I dare you to find me someone that doesn’t share that sentiment. Mmmm, warm bread with butter and homemade jam, AWESOME! Cutting back on wheat or eliminating wheat means, elimintating bread. I am not a huge pasta eater, I don’t necessarily eat very much cereal. But bread, biscuits, buns, yeah I like those. I am extremly happy about my 5 lb loss, and I will admit that it came off because of my lack of bread, but, BUT, I have only been eating my bread in the evening, and only 2 slices. So perhaps my weight loss is also because I have not been eating in the evening, and because those calories have been cut, not necessarily because of WHAT I have removed. I still am convinced (call it addiction rationalization) that wheat, (bread) is still important in my diet.
Let’s go to the spiritual arena for a minute. (but still a little rational as well)
I have struggled to take this 24 lbs off. I really mean struggled. And when I have had a week of a 1 lb gain or even a 1/2 lb gain, it bothers me. Why? Because of the struggle to lose these few pounds. But this struggle is what makes this real for me. When I lose 5 lbs in a week, possibly because of a lack of wheat, or I lose 20 lbs during lent when I give up coke and other things, its temporary. The weight comes back. But when i make a conserted effort to change the way I think about eating, to stop going to fast food joints 3 days a week, to cut back on things that are not the best for me, and I struggle to lose the 24 lbs. Then each of those pounds are a victory, that hopefully will not be seen again.
This is how my relationship with God is, a struggle. Not between Him and I, but how He answers my prayers. You see I am very selfish, I want things. Fr. Floyd was talking about this in his homily yesterday and it made me smile because it was exactly what I was thinking about this week. I Want things. And I want God to answer my prayers the way I want Him to answer them. Please Lord find me a new vehicle (TODAY) not in Your time, but mine. Please Heavenly Father, help me drop 10 lbs (THIS WEEK) so that Jason loses and I win the weigh off. Please, oh Merciful God, let me win the lottery, just once, and it doesn’t even have to be the millions, but just a few hundred thousand, I swear I will share it with all my friends and family. These are the prayers of a desperate and selfish man. Don’t get me wrong, I fully trust that our Lord provides for me and my family. I wouldn’t have made it this long if I didn’t accept that. He does answer all those pathetic prayers. He really does. Sometimes in the way I want Him too, but rarely WHEN I want Him too.
So it is with my journey to a healthier life. If it happened WHEN I wanted it too, there would be no struggle, and I would be bound to fail at it again and end up where I started or worse. So from now on, I will not growl and grumble over each 1/2 lb loss, or even 1/2 lb gains. I know this is a permanent change and it will happen over a long time, and I will be blessed when I reach that goal weight, just like I am blessed in so many other ways.
Hope this wasn’t too jumbled.
P.S.
Please say a wee prayer today for my oldest, Patrick, who enter the workforce. Started his first job at Lobster on the Wharf. He is growing up way to fast and I don’t think I am quite prepared for that yet. Peace to you today Pats, show em what you are made of, Love You!
Pax,
Brady

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One Response to Woohoooo!

  1. Jason Pitre says:

    Love this post Brady….truly, abandon to His will, one day at a time.

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